I wrote a post a few months ago about how to use storytelling when dealing with a bully. It draws from a moment in my biography that has been storied and re-storied and re-storied again to define what integrity means to me. I don’t know that the event actually happened the way I remember it. But the truth is, I use this story regularly and often to help me find courage, to do the next right thing, and to bring transformation to a situation that is uncomfortable.
You have these stories too, and you carry them like Batman’s tool belt. They are there with you at all times, ready to be deployed. If you can see them clearly as stories, you can have the agency you seek. You can use the tool without getting lost in the story. Rod, the bully, is not a bad guy—he is a character in my story. He is serving a function in a narrative I need. That’s it. Bless you Rod, wherever you are.
Then there was what happened in gym class.
As Elliot continued to reflect on the craziest day of his life, he reviewed the moment he suddenly “came to“ in gym class. He had no memory of what happened between his hallucination or whatever it was on the floating tailor’s tables and waking up in gym class, but he winced as he remembered standing there, holding the ball and having no idea what was happening.
The sensation he felt in that moment was a little bit like the effect of breathing laughing gas at the dentist. Everything was weird. He knew he was in the gymnasium, and he could see that the gym class was playing basketball, but none of it seemed like it was actually happening. He stood upright and noticed he was holding the ball. As he looked around at the other kids, it was as if everyone was in slow motion.
He saw some of his friends waving to him and calling for him to pass the ball. He saw other kids in the gym class laughing and wondering what he was doing. He saw Mr. Collier, the gym teacher, walking along the back of the gymnasium as if he didn’t care what was happening at that moment. And then he saw Rod MacArther walking straight toward him. It is possible that Rod might have been running, but since everything was in slow motion, it seemed more like walking.
Rod MacArther was the freshman class bully.
He was big and bullied lots of boys in the class, even kids that were older than him. Elliot had seen him in action in middle school and knew how to steer clear: be quiet, don’t draw any attention and definitely don’t look him in the eye. Elliot also knew that Rod was on the JV football team as a freshman and that their gym teacher, Mr. Collier, was the JV football coach. Rod had already demonstrated he was untouchable in his coach’s class when he knocked Ben Deputat into the bleachers and Mr. Collier just walked out of the gym. Elliot knew that gym class was not safe, so this situation where Rod was headed straight toward him was very dangerous indeed.
And since Elliot was in a daze, he not looked Rod in the eye, but he cocked his head and made a confused face. This was candy for a bully and Rod was now hyper motivated to practice his craft. Elliot was about to get it.
.
But then the next very strange thing happened.
As Rod closed in, Elliot marveled as the class bully began to divide. There were two Rods walking toward him, and then four, then eight, then … so many Rods. They were all storming toward him but Elliot noticed that some of the Rods looked like the freshman Rod, but others looked much younger or older. There was a Rod that had a full beard and did not look good. There was another Rod that couldn’t have been more than two years old and was hobbling forward like he had just learned how to walk. Elliot’s attention went to a Rod that was probably six or seven years old. His haircut was actually pretty similar to the current haircut, but the look in his eyes was very different. This Rod did not have hate and malice in his expression. This much younger Rod looked scared.
As Elliot focused on this Rod, the gymnasium transformed into a living room with young Rod standing with his head bowed. Elliot looked around and could see that there was a woman sitting in a chair who had clearly been crying.
“You are just like your dad!” she yelled.
And Elliot could see the young Rod bow his head even more. He got the sense that Rod’s father was in prison and had treated his mother very badly. Elliot could tell that what his mother said to him hurt badly.
Elliot was pulled out from this moment by the freshman Rod grabbing hold of him. Elliot blinked and could see Rod’s face very close to his own and just as this Rod was about to whisper something violent to him, Elliot whispered first. He did not plan what he said, nor was he even aware he was going to say anything. But without hesitation, he said,
“You are not your dad.”
Elliot could see this shocked Rod. He could see the boy’s eyes went quickly from shock to confusion, to deep sadness and then back to confusion before Rod let go of him, took a step back, and said, “I’ll get you later”.
Then he walked out of the gym and into the locker room.
Elliot stood still and strangely did not feel afraid. He wasn’t worried that Rod would get him later because he knew that this was never going to happen. Elliot was absolutely sure in that moment that Rod would never bother him again.
Yes, it was a strange day for Elliot Keech, but nothing compared to what was coming in the morning.